A Year of Lockdowns

One reduncancy, two job changes, two rolls of film, constant uncertainty, innumerable hours spent doing nothing.

While gathering these photos I am struck by a sense of nostalgia, almost certainly brought on by the inviting soft colours of the expired Kodak VR 200 film; I could be looking at pictures taken last week, last year, or maybe last century. I am drawn in by the hazy pastel tones but I am not comforted by them. They bring back the uneasy feeling that followed me when I took the photos, the feeling that time had become stagnant, the days all blending into one.

These feelings are unexpected, especially as my original intent for these photos was to restart. At the time I was still a ‘recent’ graduate whose camera was thick with dust, having barely touched it since gaining my degree in July 2019. I wanted to restart my love for creating things and experimenting, and in the process I unintentionally captured the exact feeling I was trying to escape.

Despite some uneasy feelings, these photos also remind me that I did infact manage to reignite my own creativity. Not being fully in control is something all film photographers are familiar with and is something I have come to embrace.